Urban Legends
by addledwalrus
Summary: A series of urban legends retold with the Hetalia characters, some of which will be set in a Human AU. I'll try to use lesser known stories as well as some of the more famous ones.
1. Robber on the Train

**Characters: Feliciano Vargas (North Italy)  
**

**Setting: 1990s (Human AU)  
**

* * *

Twenty year old Feliciano Vargas was an art student in Milan, pursuing his lifelong dream of becoming a famous painter. He'd shown talent ever since he was a young child, when teachers often praised his work and filled him with pride.

At the end of his first year, he packed up all of his belongings, left his apartment and boarded the train back home to Venice. It was his first time traveling alone and as he waited at the station surrounded by complete strangers, he couldn't help but feel just a little anxious.

He attempted to quell this anxiety by striking up a conversation with another young man standing next to him, whom it turned out was also from Venice. Feliciano found this to be a pleasant coincidence and began to talk to his new friend about his family.

There was a loud whistle and the train arrived. Feliciano and the other man boarded the carriage in front of them, though for some reason, no one else followed them in.

As Feliciano sat down and made himself comfortable, he watched as the other passengers all boarded different carriages as if they were trying to avoid the one that he was in. He found this a little unusual, but chose to ignore it. After all, he now had a large space all to himself and he could talk to his friend as much as he wanted.

Once everyone was safely on the train and it was ready to leave, Feliciano sought to continue the conversation he was having before. That was when the other man did a strange thing. He got up from his seat and reached inside his backpack, before pulling out a large metal canister.

"What are you doing...?" Feliciano asked him, but he did not answer.

Feliciano felt a slight twinge of dread at the man's sudden change in behaviour, which only grew when they also began to strap a gas mask on their face. The air inside the carriage seemed to grow cold and Feliciano shivered, clenching his teeth. He stood up from his seat and instinctively tried to run away, only to remembering that there was no way he could escape the now rapidly moving train without losing his life.

He took a deep breath, turned around fearfully and prayed that his fellow passenger was simply fooling around.

Feliciano found himself face to face with the masked man and could only stare into those lightless brown eyes, as a white gas suddenly sprayed out of the canister and clouded his vision. He started to feel drowsy and lost balance, falling backwards on to the floor into a deep sleep.

* * *

Feliciano awoke to find himself alone in the carriage. He blinked and sat up, rubbing his eyes and looking around. He wondered for a split second why he was on the floor before recalling the events from before.

He stood up slowly, massaging his numb legs and looked out of the window, seeing the bright blue sky and trees rushing past.

"What a scary dream..." He said out loud as he glanced down at the floor.

It took him a long while to notice that something was very wrong: all of his belongings had been stolen.

* * *

**Apparently during the nineties, there were a few cases in France and Italy of thieves boarding trains and using sleeping gas on passengers in order to steal their belongings. None of it has been verified however, so I guess people can relax.  
**


	2. The Tomato Patch

**Based On: 'Helping Papa in the Garden' **

**Characters: Lovino Vargas (South Italy), Mention of Feliciano  
**

**Setting: 1950s (Human AU)**

* * *

Twenty-two year old Lovino Vargas was in prison serving time for manslaughter and theft, though he knew full well that he had never really killed anyone, accident or not (how he hated the justice system, though he would have gladly admitted to committing theft).

Every few days, Lovino would receive a letter from his grandfather, whom he had always had quite a close bond with. The old man had raised him since he was a toddler while his own parents were living the good life in Venice with his younger brother. The old man had even stood by his side and defended him when the police came knocking on their door, an act that Lovino would be grateful for in years to come.

And so it was that morning when Lovino received a particular letter from his grandfather, that he felt he was obligated to lend some help however impossible it would have seemed.

_Dear Lovino,  
I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here, you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.  
Love, Nonno  
_

Lovino crumpled the letter up after reading it and thought about his poor grandfather, whom over the years, had so patiently put up with his every childish misdeed and episode of anger. Perhaps now was the time to finally do something in return.

He asked the prison guard for a pen and piece of paper, and began to write a letter in reply:

_Dear Nonno,  
Don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried Pietro's body.  
Love, Lovino_

Once he was finished, Lovino handed the letter to another guard and prayed that his grandfather wouldn't have a heart attack.

A few days later, Grandpa Vargas received the letter from his grandson. He read it and began to panic, the thought of his grandson truly being a murderer almost too much for him to bear. He sank down into the nearest chair, feeling as if his whole world was beginning to collapse, and reached a shaking hand towards the telephone.

The following morning, the police arrived at Grandpa Vargas' house and dug up the entire area in and around the garden plot. However, they did not find a trace of any body and eventually they all left, some apologizing to the old man and others quietly complaining about wasted time.

It was only until that night, when Grandpa Vargas received another letter from Lovino, that everything became clear.

_Dear Nonno,  
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.  
Love you, Lovino  
_

_P.S. I never killed Pietro.  
_

* * *

**I just thought this urban legend would really fit Romano, being about tomatoes and helping a family member, though I have a feeling I made him a little out of character.  
**


	3. Der Großmann

**Characters: Germany, Prussia**

**Setting: Late 19th Century (or around the time Germany was a child)  
**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or any of the urban legends described in this fanfic.**

* * *

It was the 18th of January, a very special day for young Germany, for it was the anniversary of his unification.

On the morning of that special day, Germany ate an awfully dull breakfast with Prussia and quietly envying the human children who were allowed to eat cake on their birthdays. It was just too bad that Prussia was such a stickler when it came to nutrition. As the older nation put it, his younger brother 'was to have no sugar laden or fatty foods whatsoever, for such things would only hinder his developing military prowess.'

Germany ate the rest of his tasteless porridge and was once again reminded that his 'special day' was in fact no different from any other.

When breakfast was over, Prussia gave Germany a long list of tasks he would have to complete by the end of the day. This list included such things as one hour of arithmetic, memorizing the first part of the _Nibelungenlied_, riding practice and another hour's reading of _The Art of War_ by Machiavelli, among several other things.

That afternoon while Prussia was busy in his study, Germany realized his opportunity and quietly stood up from his chair. He abandoned his reading of _The Art of War_, tiptoed down the long hallway and down the steep flight of stairs. He took extra care not to make soundless steps and not knock anything over by accident for he knew what would happen if he were caught.

Soon, Germany was running through the grass and towards the forest outside his home. He still couldn't believe that he had come this far in doing such a disobedient thing.

He came to a stop right and looked back at the large mansion in which he lived, remembering the time Prussia warned him never to wander into the forest alone.

For a moment Germany considered running back indoors, but then he thought of the countless other children who played around the forest and never experienced any danger. If it was safe for them, then what did a nation like him have to be afraid of?

An hour later, Germany greatly regretted his childish whims. He was as good as lost in the vast forest, with no idea of how to get out.

As he stumbled through the shadows, he tried to recall the lessons Prussia had given him on navigation through unfamiliar environments. He came to a stop and slumped against a smooth tree trunk to think of his next course of plan, unaware of the mysterious figure behind him.

Germany placed a hand against his chin, just as the figure extended its long fingers towards him. They slowly and gently reached for his throat, causing him to feel a slight tickling sensation, which he dismissed as just the wind doing strange work.

The fingers brushed against Germany's neck and he froze in dread, his eyes slowly widening. _Surely that was just tree leaves blowing against his body?  
_

Flying into a panic, Germany bolted from the tree trunk and broke into a sprint, his safety being the only thing on his mind now. He didn't know why, but he felt as if some creature was stalking him, just waiting for him to drop his guard.

He had not run far however, when his attacker suddenly revealed itself to him.

A figure with no face effortlessly dangled upside down from a tall tree, right in front of Germany's eyes. The 'man' (if it could even be called one), swung gently in the air like a bed sheet that had been hung out to dry. The way the man's long needle-like fingers curled, made Germany feel nauseous and he clutched his stomach, resisting the urge to throw up.

Germany clenched his teeth shut just in time and bravely looked up at his adversary, only to feel something sharp forcing itself down his throat. He experienced a sharp stab of pain, followed by an intense burning sensation, before everything went black.

* * *

"Germany, wake up! It's me, your big brother!"

"Pr-Prussia...I'm scared..." Germany stammered weakly as he opened his eyes to look up at his older brother. He remembered the creature's sickeningly long fingers shooting towards him and began to cry.

"It's alright, everything's going to be fine..." Prussia said in an unusually soft tone as he ran his hand through Germany's hair and held him close.


End file.
